Theft.

Sarah Shaver is what my friend Justice would call a Tard Wrangler. The aptly put unfortunately funny moniker is what he named those who teach children in special education. He, having been a tard wrangler himself, argues that it's warranted since all children that young are in need of a good wranglin' and when they possess a disability, things compound.

On the phone today, Sarah related a story about wranglin' at the Knoxville Aquarium. Sarah also explained the differences between different groups of children who fall into these special needs classes. The target group this time is a class of k-12 students who have personality disorders. Namely, they may have been hospitalized in the past or could be in the future; they are prone to outbursts, may be violent, etc.

It goes a little something like this:

ATTN: Thanks to the internet snoopery of Doug Battenhausen, my sister told me an urban legend. The following story is false, but still funny anyway. Thanks Doug. - MC 7/2/08


A teacher Sarah is acquainted with - let's call her Mary - was in charge of taking the aforementioned group of kids to the Knoxville Aquarium last week for an afternoon Sea Extravaganza. Of course it is tough to keep track of everybody all of the time and one young boy, estimated to be about 14, decided that he could have some "alone time" in the Aquarium and left the group. After about an hour or so of looking around the large aquarium, the boy shows up, the group moves on, everybody packs up and goes home with out having to call the cops or any parents. 20 miles into the bus ride home, Mary begins to hear rampant giggling and laughter from the back of the bus. Upon walking to the back of the bus, Mary sees that the previously missing young boy had stolen a PENGUIN from the Aquarium and just up and stuffed it in his thoroughly soaked backpack. Backpack penguin is not a happy penguin; but with out a doubt, the children were all quite pleased.

Our phone conversation ended with a combination of admiration, laughter and the question "How the hell does someone steal a penguin? Those things are goddamn BIG!"

Made my day.

Thanks Sarah!

Best

-Mike